How to Handle Your First Message in Online Dating Sites
Stay Literate
Using things like netspeak, bad syntax and terrible punctuation are turn offs in a letter. When you have the lexicon of an idiot – things like “r u there?” you’re going to sound like someone who can’t hold a real conversation. Skip the slang and make it a point to sound intelligent. The one exception to this is to use positive expressions like “haha” or “lol” which show humor and fun rather than replacing real works in a conversation. Also, if you’re telling a girl she’s lovely, you may not be – at least not in her mind.
Be Unique in Your Greeting
Skip the basic greetings like “hello” or “hi” in your emails. You’d do better to not have any sort of greeting at all in your emails or messages. Just jump right into the basics of the message and you’ll actually see a much higher conversation rate than you would otherwise. If you absolutely must have an opening of some kind, you should at least do so in a totally casual way – “what’s up?” or “hey” work better than “hello” oddly enough. It must be the tone that is casual making it easier to understand.
Talk about Your Interests
Talking about your interests will make you much more approachable for the recipient of your message. You’ll also show that you’re an interesting person with a unique personality which is more fun for everyone – the more specific your messages tend to be, the more well-received they tend to be. Using words about your interests like tattoos, literature, zombies and vegetarian are all successful.
Stay Humble
If you’re normally very confident in real life, stay humble online. Women like men who are a bit humble who are also able to say sorry when it’s due. When you’re self effacing on an online dating website, you’re going to be more approachable and comfortable for women to talk to. Women aren’t as comfortable with someone who is overly confident online. Of course, you don’t want to appear weak online since that can be shown as being desperate. Even words like “please” can have a negative consequence online.
Consider Staying Quiet on Religion
Religion can attract people or it can turn them off. It almost helps you online to avoid mentioning your faith all together until you’re more serious in your discussions. Atheists tend to do better than those with more pronounced religions in online dating communities. Of course, the obvious suggestion would be to join a community designed specifically for a particular religion if you’re going to make that some criteria for your romances.
